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"The
Face of an Angel With the Heart of a Gladiator" |
Originally
published in The Renal Review, October 2004
On
May 2 of this year 2004, Darlene Crowe and I met
for lunch at Romeo's Restaurant in Duncan so that
I could interview her in preparation for this article.
She was recommended to me as a biography candidate
because of her positive and inspiring attitude,
despite years of illness. Sadly, Darlene passed
away on September 11, 2004. She was 46 years old.
At the young age of 13, Darlene Isabelle Cripps
was diagnosed with von Hippel-Lindau disease (VHL).
According to the US National Institute of Neurological
Disorders and Stroke, VHL is a "rare, genetic
multi-system disorder characterized by the abnormal
growth of tumors in certain parts of the body ...
Individuals with VHL are also at a higher risk than
normal for certain types of cancer, especially kidney
cancer." Darlene's mother Eleanor succumbed
to VHL at the age of 49, as did her older brother
Steve when he was 26 years old. |
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During
the course of her illness Darlene faced numerous challenges.
One of the biggest was after she was diagnosed with renal
cancer. Darlene underwent surgery in order to remove the
cancer, believed at the time to be in a small area of
one kidney. There was no talk of dialysis or transplants
prior to the surgery as it was expected there would be
sufficient kidney function remaining afterwards. During
the surgery it was discovered that the cancer had actually
spread throughout both kidneys. The first kidney was removed
immediately, the second one six weeks later after a fistula
was put in place in preparation for hemodialysis.
After the surgery, Darlene said she remembered knowing
little about kidney disease and having many misconceptions
about it. She assumed she would eventually receive a transplant,
not realizing (or as she said, "not wanting to accept")
that she was not a candidate for transplantation. She
also didn't realize that people could live for years on
dialysis; she thought it was only a short-term stop-gap
measurement while waiting for a transplant (which is true
in many cases, but certainly not all). In addition, she
expected that once on dialysis she would feel ill all
the time, which did not prove to be true. Pat Chadwick
remembers meeting Darlene for the first time while she
was still in hospital recovering from her surgery. She
was asked to visit Darlene because "Darlene wanted
to see someone who had kidney disease who was up and walking
around, not lying in bed sick."
That kind of attitude stood Darlene in good stead throughout
her life. Her husband Bruce Crowe said of her, "She
always faced each new roadblock with a smile and simply
carried on with her life ... No matter what the adversity
she always had a smile that would light up a room and
a demeanour which showed an innocence and naivety which
belied the determination which hid beneath the surface.
I can best describe it as the face of an angel with the
heart of a gladiator." Ironically, Darlene and Bruce
originally met when Bruce and his first wife catered Darlene's
first wedding. They met again years later after they had
both divorced and became close friends. They married on
September 18, 1993.
Darlene loved reading and her favourite subjects included
self-help books, biographies, books on spirituality, ESP,
and positive thinking. She highly recommended the classic
bestseller Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain. Creative
visualization "is the art of using mental imagery
and affirmation to produce positive changes in your life."
This could be in your career, education, health, fitness,
creativity, self-esteem, or any other area of your life
you wish to change or improve. Darlene said she often
practiced creative visualization, meditation, and positive
thinking.
Darlene's actions followed her attitude. She was active
in the renal community in Nanaimo, volunteering with both
VIKPA and the KFC. She was a former president of the local
chapter of the KFC and produced a small newsletter for
the local unit. As well, she often would bring in games
or decorations for the renal unit. In the summer of 2003,
she and husband Bruce organized a pig roast and head-shaving
event at the Timberland Pub in Cassidy, raising $4300
for VIKPA. She was also the Nanaimo correspondent for
this newsletter, passing along news of interest to other
renal patients.
Darlene Crowe's wonderful strength and attitude helped
her overcome the many challenges in her life. Her positive
attitude was followed closely by positive deeds which
benefitted many people. "I have always felt that
she stood as a tower of inspiration to people whose lives
are challenged by problems of one kind or another,"
relates her husband Bruce. In addition to Bruce, Darlene
is also survived by her daughter, Julie; granddaughters,
Katarina and Sammy; by Bruce's children, Kevin and Karen;
and by Karen's daughter, Kaelyn. She is greatly missed
by one and all.
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